As I was beginning a call with a potential client, I started the call with “Is this still a good time for you?”. I asked as she sounded a bit distracted. I wanted to make sure nothing bad had come up and she was trying to figure out how to reschedule.
Her response … “Yes, it’s fine.”
FINE … I really hate this word. Fine has become the word you use to hide your true feelings, thoughts, and emotions. As she said ‘fine’, I somewhat chuckled. Realizing that I had chuckled out loud, I quickly explained my gut reaction to the use of the word ‘fine’. I mean, using the word ‘fine’ comes across most of the time as sarcasm, indecision, or not really meaning what you are saying. This was not the case for her.
How often do you use the ‘F’ word of fine?
This is a new one for me as I had never really thought about it until this moment. Then as the day went on, I found myself using it and using it more than I wanted. Example, as I was choosing what I wanted for dinner, I heard my internal voice … “This is fine and I really want this one.” Indecision. Or another example that all of us can relate to is when you are angry with someone – this person is not even aware of your anger – and when asked “how was your day?” … you respond with “Fine!”. Any man will tell you that when a woman says ‘fine’, things are far from ‘fine’.
Why do you use this word?
Habit is the quickest and easiest answer. On a deeper level, it is due to being afraid of sharing the reality of emotions you are in at that moment. You hide your true emotions behind words, this word or other similar words … such as OK. The fear lies in having a past experience (usually negative) where you were criticized to not share your honest emotions. In the corporate world, sharing emotions is considered taboo. You have to be professional! Same thing applies in your own business. No one wants you spewing your emotions all other the place. And, there is some truth to this.
What it all boils down to is what you choose to share of yourself and your emotions and with whom you are sharing. Choosing to dive deep into yourself to understand the need to hide these emotions … where do they come from and why do you still have these underlying conditioned emotions that need to be hidden from the world. Choosing to make a change not to ‘hide’ anymore … from yourself and others … will dynamically change you and your world. All of the desires and yearnings you have … better career, great health, caring relationship … will be yours.
I can help you make this change. This is what I do … transform your life. Don’t you want that? You are not broken, you desire more.